yes there are errors in the text

use your freaking’ imagination to correct them

The Importance of Being Respected

I awoke from a bad dream, thoughts and anxieties circling and intertwining in my mind. I nearly stepped upon my little dog as I struggled to get out of the tangled blankets and bedspread, adding to a dreadful sense of guilt or foreboding that followed me from the other world of dreams. But somewhere in the process of escaping, a question I had held unresolved in my mind for over two years now seemed to get answered.

You see, ever since a particular evening of being introduced to strangers, that had melded into a sort of alternative family, in a small local bar outside of Chicago I had been troubled by something. Something that will surely seem trivial to many of you, and it is also the sort of thing which others will have resolved without ever having seen it as a problem. Indeed my concern with the issue probably comes from having been somewhere lost between cultures for quite some time.

What I was struck by was the simple human proclivity with announcing, and often embellishing, one’s own accomplishments. Storytelling, bragging, creating tall tales with yourself as the hero. Growing up I somehow imbibed the ideal of modesty, or humility. In grade school I remember being struck by the tale of St. George slaying the dragon, and then proclaiming that it was just a puny worm, ah such an honourable fellow that George. And then I went to Japan where, except for the occasional Sake induced pissing contest it is poor form to brag on yourself (you should have underlings do that for you.)

Having spent a fair amount of time talking with strangers I’ve often been dismayed be the way they insist upon telling me wonderful things about themselves. And frankly, it has hurt my self-esteem, I’ve not accomplished a single heroic task in my life, not one, and yet I seem to meet people that Ulysses to shame. It’s not that I’m not interested in learning about others, it’s just that I’d much rather hear their ideas and thoughts on a variety of things, than hear how they told someone off or scored the winning touchdown in every college football game etc.

This behavior, this bragging, had been nagging at me, and instead of feeling it was natural I felt like I needed a better explanation for it, some way to make sense out of it. So as I trudged over the cats and down through the hallway and toward wakefulness I turned on a light rubbed my eyes and said “Respect. These people just want to feel respected.”

Don’t we all?

In case you’re feeling down..

Brain scans have proven that simply looking at pleasant images lights up the “Happypart” of your brain (sorry for the scientific jargon!) So enjoy the cute and cuddly and avoid the grim horrifying images that are so often on TV.

Life Update

‘k, I’m workin at the librario-Toushoukan for you folks in Sushi-land- enjoying it mostly. Occasionally get a chance to help people find some good books and help with interesting papers and the like. I’ve decided to give this creative-silliness a try again. Feel like there’s not enough joy in what I’m doing at school. It’s not real hard, but in some ways that is the problem. As a friend of mine said “It’s all just busy work!” I have been using my time to educate myself though and things are starting to come together in some weird way. I’ve been very Buddhist lately in my thinking and it has helped. Compassion for all beings is by and large underrated. The transience of life, and just how very precious it is…well being more aware of it does seem to provide more real moments.

Such thoughts have helped me get through the  whole divorce trauma without being hateful or angry. I admit to getting angry sometimes, but they pass pretty quickly and that’s important to me. Optimism has never been my forte, but I’m working on being a little less pessimistic.

I’ve had some GREAT conversations with my friend Raymond about human nature. He sees it as basically bad, or even evil. Merely asking me the question and stating his opinion made me realize that I feel it’s rather the opposite. People generally tend to treat each other pretty well, at least when in a semi-natural environment. Now here’s where the evolutionary psychology comes in, we (humans) have spent most of our history living in small groups. Rather like chimps, I might add. And in such an environment the social group quickly figures out when someone lies or cheats and begins to distrust the folks who do these things. If someone does something terrible they would be banished from the group and forced to survive on their own. Like a wolf without a pack, they probably won’t last long.

This is streamofconsciousnessbloggingbytheway-thinkJamesjoycewithanIQof70,

oh&pleasewipeyourfeetonthedoormat.ThankYou.

Now, take a wolf from his natural environment, put him in a small cage alone and observe his behavior. Pretty soon he’ll become pretty psychotic. He needs space to roam, scents to investigate and he needs a pack of comrades. Give him those things and he can face the world. Remove them and you cripple his very soul. His behavior becomes irrational and counterproductive.

Can you see what I am saying about people?  We are living in an unnatural environment. At least many of us are. OK the above example isn’t that great because it doesn’t very well address the social and communicative aspects of the wolf’s nature that are being cut away by his caged environment. But I made half a point anyway, didn’t I? I’ll try more when I’m slightly more sober.

Divorce, good and bad…

Good thing about divorce: I’ve been free to read a ton of really stimulating books and sit in the sunshine and Think (with a capitol T) and its been a productive period for me in that sense.

Bad thing about divorce: I miss the shampoo smell of a woman’s hair just after she’s washed it, and before it dries all the way….OH what a peace- ful lovely sensation that is…

Other random thoughts: Crap! I’m out of beer! …I wonder if the gas station is still open?…well Love & Peace to y’all..

“To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” –Emerson

Recently (well kinda recently) Read:

Happiness: lessons from a new science / Richard Layard

From a distinguished economist and leading figure in the new field of happiness studies comes this revolutionary work addressing the elusive concept of happiness and how we can have more of it. Based on sophisticated, cutting-edge scientific research, Happiness integrates insights gleaned from psychology, neuroscience, sociology, and applied economics to draw surprising conclusions about the true causes of happiness and the means we have to effect it. (Hint: It probably isn’t wealth or fame.)

From Bookmarks Magazine
Reviewers agree that Layard, a leading British economist and well-known government advisor, raises fundamentally important questions that we all tend to ignore in our strivings to achieve on a daily basis. The author supplies ample data to show that capitalism’s emphasis on individualism and competition has helped to diminish the feeling of a common good among people of different classes and societies. The critics disagree, however, on Layard’s recommendation of state- and church-oriented intervention to reverse the patterns of behavior that are not, in so many eyes, contributing to happiness. Since “happiness studies” is a new science (see Gregg Easterbrook’s The Progress Paradox *** Mar/Apr 2004), it stands to reason that the early tomes of this philosophy would stir controversy. Just don’t let it dampen your day.

http://cep.lse.ac.uk/layard/

Authentic Happiness: using the new positive psychology to realize your potential for lasting fulfillment / Martin E.P. Seligman.

 

From Publishers Weekly
In his latest user-friendly road map for human emotion, the author of the bestselling Learned Optimism proposes ratcheting the field of psychology to a new level. “Relieving the states that make life miserable… has made building the states that make life worth living less of a priority. The time has finally arrived for a science that seeks to understand positive emotion, build strength and virtue, and provide guideposts for finding what Aristotle called the `good life,’ ” writes Seligman. Thankfully, his lengthy homage to happiness may actually live up to the ambitious promise of its subtitle. Seligman doesn’t just preach the merits of happiness e.g., happy people are healthier, more productive and contentedly married than their unhappy counterparts but he also presents brief tests and even an interactive Web site (the launch date is set for mid-August) to help readers increase the happiness quotient in their own lives. Trying to fix weaknesses won’t help, he says; rather, incorporating strengths such as humor, originality and generosity into everyday interactions with people is a better way to achieve happiness. Skeptics will wonder whether it’s possible to learn happiness from a book. Their point may be valid, but Seligman certainly provides the attitude adjustment and practical tools (including self-tests and exercises) for charting the course.
Copyright 2002 Cahners Business Information, Inc.

 

The Moral Animal is a 1994 book by Robert Wright. The New York Times Book Review chose Wright’s The Moral Animal as one of the 12 best books of 1994; it was a national bestseller and has been published in 12 languages.

The book explores many facets of our everyday life through the lens of evolutionary biology. Wright attempts to relay Darwinian explanations for human behavior and psychology, our social dynamics and structures, as well as our relationships with lovers, friends, and family.

The book borrows extensively from Charles Darwin‘s official publications, including his famed Origin of the Species, but also from his less well-known chronicles and personal writings, illustrating behavioral principles with Darwin’s own biographical examples.

Nonzero: The Logic of Human Destiny is a book by Robert Wright originally published in 2000. It argues that biological evolution and cultural evolution are shaped and directed first and foremost by “non-zero-sumness,” that is, the prospect of creating new situations that are not zero-sum.

From Publishers Weekly
Evolution meets game theory in this upbeat follow-up to Wright’s much-praised The Moral Animal. Arguing against intellectual heavyweights such as Isaiah Berlin, Karl Popper and Franz Boas, Wright contends optimistically that history progresses in a predictable direction and points toward a certain end: a world of increasing human cooperation where greed and hatred have outlived their usefulness. This thesis is elaborated by way of something Wright calls “non-zero-sumness,” which in game theory means a kind of win-win situation. The non-zero-sum dynamic, Wright says, is the driving force that has shaped history from the very beginnings of life, giving rise to increasing social complexity, technological innovation and, eventually, the Internet. From Polynesian chiefdoms and North America’s Shoshone culture to the depths of the Mongol Empire, Wright plunders world history for evidence to show that the so-called Information Age is simply part of a long-term trend. Globalization, he points out, has been around since Assyrian traders opened for business in the second millennium B.C. Even the newfangled phenomenon of “narrowcasting” was anticipated, he claims, when the costs of print publishing dropped in the 15th century and spawned a flurry of niche-oriented publications. Occasionally, Wright’s use of modish terminology can seem glib: feudal societies benefited from a “fractal” structure of nested polities, world culture has always been “fault-tolerant” and today’s societies are like a “giant multicultural brain.” Despite the game-theory jargon, however, this book sends an important message that, as human beings make moral progress, history, in its broadest outlines, is getting better all the time. (Feb.)

“With elegance and insight, Fareed Zakaria sets forth for our times a fundamental truth previously articulated by Aristotle and Tocqueville:  unregulated democracy undermines liberty and the rule of law. The Future of Freedom is one of the most important books on global political trends to appear in the past decade.  Its sobering analysis has vital lessons for all of us concerned with freedom’s future in the world.” –Samuel Huntington

Reading bits here and there as I get the time and in the mood:

From Publishers Weekly
Bloom’s debut, The Lucifer Principle (1997), sought the biological basis for human evil. Now Bloom is after even bigger game. While cyber-thinkers claim the Internet is bringing us toward some sort of worldwide mind, Bloom believes we’ve had one all along. Drawing on information theory, debates within evolutionary biology, and research psychology (among other disciplines), Bloom understands the development of life on Earth as a series of achievements in collective information processing. He stands up for “group selection” (a minority view among evolutionists) and traces cooperation among organismsAand competition between groupsAthroughout the history of evolution. “Creative webs” of early microorganisms teamed up to go after food sources: modern colonies of E. coli bacteria seem to program themselves for useful, nonrandom mutations. Octopi “teach” one another to avoid aversive stimuli. Ancient Sparta killed its weakest infants; Athens educated them. Each of these is a social learning system. And each such system relies on several functions. “Conformity enforcers” keep most group members doing the same things; “diversity generators” seek out new things; “resource shifters” help the system alter itself to favor new things that work. In Bloom’s model, bowling leagues, bacteria, bees, Belgium and brains all behave in similar ways. Lots of real science and some historyAmuch of it fascinating, some of it quite obscureAgo into Bloom’s ambitious, amply footnoted, often plausible arguments. He writes a sometimes bombastic prose (“A neutron is a particle filled with need”); worse yet, he can fail to distinguish among accepted facts, scientifically testable hypotheses and literary metaphors. His style may guarantee him an amateur readership, but he’s not a crank. Subtract the hype, and Bloom’s concept of collective information processing may startle skeptical readers with its explanatory power. (Aug.)
Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.

From Publishers Weekly
Like Thoreau and the band Devo, psychology professor Schwartz provides ample evidence that we are faced with far too many choices on a daily basis, providing an illusion of a multitude of options when few honestly different ones actually exist. The conclusions Schwartz draws will be familiar to anyone who has flipped through 900 eerily similar channels of cable television only to find that nothing good is on. Whether choosing a health-care plan, choosing a college class or even buying a pair of jeans, Schwartz, drawing extensively on his own work in the social sciences, shows that a bewildering array of choices floods our exhausted brains, ultimately restricting instead of freeing us. We normally assume in America that more options (“easy fit” or “relaxed fit”?) will make us happier, but Schwartz shows the opposite is true, arguing that having all these choices actually goes so far as to erode our psychological well-being. Part research summary, part introductory social sciences tutorial, part self-help guide, this book offers concrete steps on how to reduce stress in decision making. Some will find Schwartz’s conclusions too obvious, and others may disagree with his points or find them too repetitive, but to the average lay reader, Schwartz’s accessible style and helpful tone is likely to aid the quietly desperate.

From Publishers Weekly
Starred Review. “For any of us, perhaps our greatest potential regret may be that of not seizing the moment and honoring it for what it is when it is here,” writes bestselling author Kabat-Zinn (Full Catastrophe Living; Wherever You Go, There You Are; etc.). The scientist who pioneered the use of the Buddhist technique of mindfulness (or moment-by-moment awareness) to help patients cope with the stress and pain of illness arrived at this poignant lesson after seeing the way his father, an eminent immunologist who suffered from Alzheimer’s disease, lost all sense of who he was and what was happening to him. In a passionate tour de force that blends personal experience with cutting-edge science (his own and others’), poetry and insights culled from many traditions, Kabat-Zinn sets out to awaken us to the true potential and value of a gift that most of us take for granted: sentience. Our lack of awareness of our impact on the rest of the world amounts to “a kind of auto-immune disease of the earth.” Borrowing an analogy made by the neuroscientist Francisco Varela, Kabat-Zinn compares the way our immune system senses the whole of our bodily self to our potential for a mindful awareness. That is, the practice of cultivating this conscious, heightened sentience leads to the realization of our wholeness, as we begin to realize that we don’t live just within the envelope of our own senses, sensations and thoughts but within the whole of all that is. Kabat-Zinn illuminates the many facets of this selfless way of being, not just with Buddhist understanding and verse but with quotes from Einstein (“A human being is a part of the whole, called by us ‘Universe’ “), Dickinson, Rilke and many other Western greats. Ardent, personal, frankly opinionated in places, this book seeks to wake up as individuals and as a culture. It is a treasure trove of contemporary wisdom.

From Publishers Weekly
A psychotherapist and Buddhist meditation teacher in the tradition of Jack Kornfield (who contributes a foreword), first-time author Brach offers readers a rich compendium of stories and techniques designed to help people awaken from what she calls “the trance of unworthiness.” The sense of self-hatred and fearful isolation that afflicts so many people in the West can be transformed with the steady application of a loving attention infused with the insights of the Buddhist tradition, according to Brach. Interweaving stories from her own life as a hardworking single mother with many wonderful anecdotes culled from her therapy practice and her work as a leader of meditation retreats, Brach offers myriad examples of how our pain can become a doorway to love and liberation. An older Catholic woman in one of Brach’s weekend workshops, for example, recounts how she learned to ask God to help hold her pain. Like her colleagues Kornfield, Sharon Salzberg, Joseph Goldstein and others in the Vipassana or Insight meditation tradition, Brach is open-minded about where she gathers inspiration. Garnishing her gentle advice and guided meditation with beautiful bits of poetry and well-loved if familiar dharma stories, Brach describes what it can mean to open to the reality of other people, to live in love, to belong to the world. Obviously the fruit of the author’s own long and honest search, this is a consoling and practical guide that can help people find a light within themselves.

What am I reading? Do Inquiring Minds really give a crap? Of course they do. What’s the first thing you do when you walk into someone’s abode? Scan the bookshelves and the knickknacks for interesting things to talk and learn about. So here’s the tour:

 

Finished.On the coffee table to the left, is Sperm Are From Men, Eggs Are From Women by Joe Quirk. (A scientifically rigorous, delightfully vulgar romp through the genes that shape us and the past that shaped them.) much more intelligent than other books I have read on the differences between men and women. And it has more sex too! Reveals efforts to hide the myriad examples of homosexuality among our fellow animals through bias and political agendas and why evolution selected for these genes.

Scattered about the house you also see:

The American Soul: Rediscovering the Wisdom of the Founders by Jacob Needleman. A look deep into the philosophies and wisdom that created a country born not out of ethnic or tribal identity but out of the idea of Freedom as necessary for the advancement of Wisdom.

Finished.American Sphinx: The Character of Thomas Jefferson by Joseph Ellis. America’s conflict between Liberty and Slavery wrapped up in one fascinating individual. A great book. I could Identify more with Jefferson’s character than that of Franklin, dreamer vs. pragmatist i suppose. Really helped me understand the Virginia Planter class and their lifestyle. The ways Jefferson hid from himself the injustice and cruelty of slavery was interesting and sad.

Finished.Benjamin Franklin: An American Life by Walter Isaacson. A fascinating and insightful man. And quite cold towards his own family in many ways. His pronouncement of America as place with fewer wealthy people and fewer poor than Europe is, sadly, a lost American ideal. It’s now the other way around. Learned that Ben liked to have a pint with David Hume, now that would be a good party.

Hocus Pocus by Kurt Vonnegut. A cynical, crotchety and amusing story teller who recently left us to rail against “civilization” with our friend Mr. Twain in the Everafter.

Stopped Reading.Refuse to Choose! Use ALL of you Interests, Passions, And Hobbies To Create The Life Of Your Dreams by Barbara Sher. Its OK to be curious about everything, ala Mr. Franklin and our current emphasis on specialization largely grew out of the Space Race and the emphasis on training engineers and technicians to kill the Russians more effectively than they could kill us.

Finished.Games of Command by Linnea Sinclair. Science fiction adventure with love and tasteful sex.

The Sanno Ichiro novels of Laura Joh Rowland. A New Orleans writer who sets her detective to work in the fascinating world of The Genroku Period Japan. (1688-1704)

Sometimes I feel quite lonely even around some of my friends and family. I guess the reason is that the things I find exciting, fun and a valuable way to spend my time somehow seem foreign to them. The fact that I can spend most of the day at my computer, reading or just going for a walk or sitting on the back porch thinking seems to baffle them. It even seems to make some people uncomfortable. “Why don’t you move? Or DO something?” They don’t realize that my mind is traveling far away and actively wrestling with problems, examining ideas from different points of view, and that this is challenging and worth while for me. The dirty dishes and the messy desk and bookshelf don’t bother me because I’m somewhere else. I’m looking right through them. I almost feel I can stretch out and lay on the grass near the river bank with the fellow who thought up the compact that became the Iroquois Nation. Now I have no illusions that my mental wanderings will lead to such an impact on the world, but I do think they enrich life somehow. I feel these journeys are necessary and profitable. They are my life, far more than the mundane tasks that I perform or the work that I do in an office cubicle.

How I do wish that they could see through my eyes for I can not articulate the beauty of the places that I go. I can not impress upon others the reality of these places. Nor can I explain the feelings that these journeys create in my Heart. The warmth of compassion, the overflowing joy, nor the sorrow, nor the sufferings are shared. The loneliness comes from this inability to share these voyages with anyone. The beauty of a sunset, as our Mother reaches out her subdued rays to gently caress the freshly mown grass for one last time before they are separated by forces beyond their understanding and control. To only be able to explain the importance of this event and how it can instruct us to lead better lives! “Wherefore art Thou Romeo?” is but a faded echo of this event, of this eternally recurring event.

It seems that far too many remain unaware of the places they have yet to visit. This shouldn’t surprise me I suppose. How few of us have the leisure to tread these paths? Most of us are caught up simply trying to survive, and not a few are forced to spend their time looking for ways to pay the mortgage or get the car repaired. And still I hope that with time more will be able to see what might be, rather than spend all of their energies on what is.

You see, Clarksville is a place that might be. A home that we all might share. A place where we have the leisure to pursue dreams.

こんにちわ日本の友達！久しぶり日本語で書くのでいっぱい間違いする、すみません！今はクラクスヴィル、テネシイ州に住んでいます。妹のリンちゃんのうちに住んでいます。仕事を探しています。暇な時間が多いです。ようく庭で働いています。芝生なしな 所があったから芝生の種をまきました。ダンダン大きくなっています。うれしいです!こちらはシカゴより安宅伊です、ほっまにいいてんきです。ほんとの春なかんじです。シカゴはあまり春がないんな所と思うていました。

最近はアメリカの一番大きいバスケトボールターナメントがありました。テネシイ大学の女性チームはよくがんばりました。いつも強いチームです。勝ちました！http://utladyvols.cstv.com/sports/w-baskbl/tennw-w-baskbl-body.html#00　コーチは厳しいというっています、けど厳しいだからよく勝ちますという人がいます。コーチもテネシイ大学の女性バースケトボールチームのプレーヤでした。